Sunday, May 30, 2004
hmmm attended the CLS FO camp nightwalk...looked at the fresh faces of the freshie and it makes me think, it seems like yesterday i had my first very own FO camp man!!! how time have passed! so swiftly and surely..im a year 3 now, as they say "abang-abang" translated big brother =)hehehe meaning im growing old and soon will reach adult status!!!!! nooooooooo die sia like this...today my aunt ask me, whether im engaged already and im like!!! DUDE im 19 man~~ sheesh..already feel so old and that question made it worst ah..i mean im trying to cherish, saviour, enjoy and taste every single moment of my life...i guesss that is how i see life now.."enjoy it"..as simple as that..so ya i drop abit of the grades, paper chasing thing and learn there is more to life then just that.. =) gonna miss my childhood soon ...sniff sniff
ok lah, need to do tutorials now..cherry ho!
smoke on the water.
10:40 PM
Sunday, May 23, 2004
oh yes, second week of CPTC is now gone..hehehe soo much stuff i have learnt...its abit of a squeeze in my head ah..and yes the examinations results is closer also...hmmm wonder how im gonna fair? i mean im not gonna fail any but i dont wanna get average results either..aiming for at least a B =)
lol i got lectured by one of my girl friends to not give up in chasing a girl...hahahaha..hmmm its not as easy as it seem to just not give up...one must know when to just call it quit and move on man...im been trying to tell her that for like hours but she just comes back with like "if you really like her" stuff ah...hahaha..it somehow gave me new hopes but it scares me if its actually false hopes ah..no one wants to be raise up high but only to be drop down hard...that just sucks man...bah but emotions aside, no mood to really talk about it yet, went to orchard today to catch a movie..it was damn crowded, too crowded for my likings..but then i need to check out this pc store at Lucky plaza...and guess what
it was close! of all things, close!! crap man..i was so dissappointed..sooo close yet soo far
smoke on the water.
12:48 AM
Saturday, May 15, 2004
hahaha first week of CPTC habis finish....still got 5 more weeks left to endure ah...wahahaha and im like tired like hell crapped..lol..tomorrow going sentosa to chill with friends ah...hmmm how is it going to be ? i dont know man..i think i go learn my guitar now...see you later baby ;)
smoke on the water.
12:35 AM
Tuesday, May 11, 2004
oh look, grace hijacked my blog...*PANICKED* righttt...hahaha as i like to shout "DONT PANICK!!!" hahaha..man, today i feel empty inside..i mean its like something is missing...i dont know what im missing...its missing alright =P or it just might be all those fumes i breathe in from Jurong Island ah!! bah CPTC training is slacked ah!!! go there and slacked, lecture, break, talk to teacher and it repeats till like 5 pm!!! hahaha but it will change once go Plant Unit ah!! cant wait to wear my PPE *personal protection equipment* jumpsuit, helmet etc...wohoooo, ok honestly i dont know what sensibles thing i can post for now ah..cant really think straight =)
smoke on the water.
11:04 PM
wahey! lookie who hijacked your blog!! .. i'm slowly taking over your life firdaus! anyway .. since you dun have a like .. tagboard ... so i'll tag here! .. lol yups so i was like .. thinking .. looking back on my sec 2 pic .. and yours ... i mean physically i didnt change much that what i think.. and i supposed you think you didnt change much too .. like mentally and emotionally ... but still you feel the same ./. even though i'm like .. 19 soon ... but still .. feel .. like .. what's happening? lol ...
smoke on the water.
1:24 PM
hmmmm today is Jesmund 19th birthday...im already like 19 yr 5 mths old..along with grace using my sec 2 pic as her display and chahat nick " i miss you " ...it can only point to me 1 direction...my my how much have i grown...im like half way towards being a 20 yr old guy!! can you imagine that? i cant there is soo much still left for me to do...i mean soon enough i hit 21, then 25, then 30, then 45, etc...wahahaha i wonder how much have i change? i mean i cant really judge myself on how much i have changed because im me and i cant see or feel the difference...i mean in terms of physical looks, god i see no difference since like 4 years ago...i still look basically generally!!! the same!! and that smile...lol ok lah, i did grow taller, way taller...but that is norm... what i wanna know is my character and attitude, has it even change...i mean everyone wants to be a better person, i want to be one too..anyway i have to sleep now, duty calls at CPTC later on..night
smoke on the water.
12:19 AM
Monday, May 10, 2004
ok its 12.30 am now, and i have to wake up at 6 am later..lol WTH am i still awake ah? good question and i have no answer for it...i guess its my vacation so ya...bah i think i sleep now..night
smoke on the water.
12:30 AM
Sunday, May 09, 2004
If you search for tenderness
It isn't hard to find
You can have the love you need to live
But if you look for truthfulness
You might just as well be blind
It always seems to be so hard to give
Chorus
Honesty is such a lonely word
Everyone is so untrue
Honesty is hardly ever heard
And mostly what I need from you
I can always find someone
To say they sympathize
If I wear my heart out on my sleeve
But I don't want some pretty face
To tell me pretty lies
All I want is someone to believe
CHORUS
I can find a lover
I can find a friend
I can have security
Until the bitter end
Anyone can comfort me
With promises again
I know, I know
When I'm deep inside of me
Don't be too concerned
I won't ask for nothin' while I'm gone
But when I want sincerity
Tell me where else can I turn
Because you're the one that I depend upon
Chorus
a song by billy joel titled Honesty...this is how im feeling right now, its 1.30 am, no one to talk too, DOD is jerking and my comp is slowing down...dont leave all alone
smoke on the water.
1:31 AM
Saturday, May 08, 2004
Time: VE-day Victory Europe day...*signifies end of WW2*
Location: homeland singapore bukit batok
woooooohooooooooooooooo shiiiiooooook!!!!!! no more exams...lol i saw a few girls dressed up to go clubbing...wow they looked pretty hot! *sizzles* rofl, hahahaha and im here at home blogging away...yes yes im a boring guy, but who cares ah? my idea of fun at night is not going Zouk or Devil's bar...but just stay at home and watch tv...its relaxing and free..hahaha
man my holiday is soo screwed...monday start CPTC training liau at Jurong Island ..wahahaha no pay, no allowance, transport fee and lunch money self expenditure!!! thank god it end on 18 june...still can have abit of my holiday!
=( i hoped something nice happen sia....its like bah i think i deserve something? been soo nice, soo helpful and stuff...argh!!!
smoke on the water.
12:00 AM
Friday, May 07, 2004
lol it seem some people are making a fuss about my previous blog..lol hahaha come on, its a blog where ones deepest and darkest secret is post for anyone to see man... yes i do like the girl *who i shall not disclose =PpP* but its not like i want to have a serious relationship with her or what...i just like her...if i want to have a serious relatioship with her cos i like her, then i have like 4 gfs already..hahaha cos i like a few girls...for me, they are the package!!! besides i think and most probaby is, they want me to stay as friends..that all...so ya its better to see it coming then to be hit by the coming.. i mean to me, im better off not trying and dont get rejected then trying and getting rejected...=)
and ya nothing wrong with liking a girl right?? i mean, its natural man..not that im gonna marry her or what...having a relationship for me is something unknown to me...yes im 19 and im still single..big deal.. some of the ppl out there takes teenage love life too seriously lah...i look at the simpler finer things in life...if i have gf, ok loh, break break loh, dont have dont have loh...of course sometimes it hurts, it hurts you bad and you start playing all those love songs bla bla bla... yes we are still human, i am still human..just a simple normal guy who of course have human feeling and emotions...i see other couples happy happy, of course i get jealous..no doubt, i cant hide the fact but what i also dont hide is, though im jealous....i try not to compare my life with others..how i wanna run it is how i wanna run it...im 19 and expected to live till 80 plus..i dont want to boogle myself down with such things... i guess by now girls would think that if im your bf, i wont be serious and cant be trusted...that is not true..that is the wrong idea here..if i have a gf of course i would love her deep and much..if i break up with her or caught her cheating, of course i feel sad..but isnt this part and parcel of life? i do want a girl..someone for me but not everyone gets the cake and eat it too =)
i guess the problem with some ppl here is that, they make this whole matter like its life and death but yet they dont realise that if you are sooo focus on that alone, what life do you have? i hoped you peeps understand what im talking about :)
smoke on the water.
3:16 PM
Wednesday, May 05, 2004
Time: D-day + 7
Location: Bastogne
hmmmm had fluid mech A and today had BIA..hohohoho the future looks bright for me..LOL but then i saw a few of my friend who looked disturbed..and got this girl friend of mine who cried...at first i thought she was sick and had a bad flu or something..eyes and nose red but upon smsing her, she said she cried..sighed..stupid firdaus, that was like my oppurtunity!!!!! baka baka!!!! i could have like *imagine*
me:hey girl? what happen to you? you look terrible? sicked?
girl: neh, sniff sniff...i cried..the paper was hard and all, i scared im gonna flunk it..now so stress..
me:now now, dont cry ah? have faith in yourself man..its ok lah..OK dont cry?
girl: wahahahaha (hugs me and cry on my shoulder)
by now if syahmi is reading this, he would say...righttttt...lol but i never got hug by a girl before, let alone cry upon...hahaha ok lah, its no joking matter but still...it will well make me feel good...i guess it would give me a plus point? man, you girls would think im a jerk now do you? cant blame you all...unlike some believe..im not that good with girls..i dont understand them.. yet guys come to me for advice about girls..why? god knows..guess my advices do have reasoning and logic...that why im soo good at giving advice ah? =P
ok im crapping now cos last paper is on friday!!!! then freaking CPTC..freakakakakakakakakakakakkaka
smoke on the water.
9:15 PM
Tuesday, May 04, 2004
heylo myself!
hahaha =P lol after sleeping for 8 hours!! i feel GREAT!!!! wohooo hehehehe...lol and someone thought im having relationship problems, hahahaha i just needed a good sleep man..that all..and good music! anyway yesterday night i chatted with a few lady friends of mine ah..and well it hit me, like a brick to a freaking chicken...maybe what grace say about me in the friendster testimonial is true..im a serial flirtist...funny that i say this but i just realised, lol i actually flirt with them here and there..hehehehe but doubt i can help myself for that..its like a norm for me now man...i know of 1 girl friend who doesnt like people who does that flirting and all, she said it gives the wrong signal to the other member of the opposite sex..but its nothing that serious to an extend..i mean it just a way to sweet talk aint it? and since me being a guy? shouldnt i master that? lol it makes a guy sweet right? hmmm and really why im like this maybe because i have girl friends who actually do "flirt" with me...ok lah how i define flirt is simple, "you talk to somone of the opposite sex, (unless you're gay) like you are attracted to them but its nothing too serious". of course to think of it, when you talk to someone, shouldnt you be attracted to them? in 1 way or the other?? its only polite to be so and not just talk to them for the sake of talking..come mon man, that is just soo shallow..
lol so i guess being flirt at makes me flirty too!! hahahaha you read that grace? lol...its like magnetising a iron nail with a magnet and soon enough the iron will become a magnet too man! heh but i have to watch who i flirt with sometimes, i dont want them to get the wrong idea...that wont be nice...but seriously i think guys like syahmi should try it sometimes...i mean just flirt with some girls ah..it help you boost your motivation when it comes to that special *ahem* someone... hahahaha ..oh man, need to shower now.. laterer baby ;)
smoke on the water.
10:25 AM
